I recently rode a train from Cleveland all the way to the capital of the United States, Washington DC. This was part of an ongoing goal of mine, in which I travel to three biggest countries in North America. These being Mexico, Canada and the United States. As I am already living in the United States, I figured that it would be needed to select a state to represent the country. It was between the capital or the city that never sleeps and after a coin toss, I made it to Washington.
I traveled to DC before, a few years ago, but now that I have some form of appreciation for traveling, I would like to properly indulge in the aesthetics of DC.
On this trip, I decided to begin this journey by train and I had some concerns about the train experience. After all, this would be my first time traveling by train. It seemed so simple, hop on the train and then enjoy the views for ten hours. Most likely, I have been traumatized by airplanes, as traveling by train seemed extremely peaceful. My worries were put to rest as I actually made it to the passenger car. As the train bobbled from left to right, I couldn’t help but feel woozed by the motion in which the train operated. It felt as if I was floating at sea, the motion of the train imitating those of waves. The train was clashing with the tracks in the same rhythm in which waves hit the sea.
I was even lucky enough to have a companion with me. An elderly lady who seems to be also traveling by train for the first time. We quickly bonded over our similarities and chatted for two hours. Afterwards, the conversations were on and off as we both drifted to sleep from time to time.
While my friend was asleep, I was pondering over certain aspects of communications. I was curious about the idea of “what makes people want to talk to one and another”. My first thought was that anyone who can communicate effectively could theoretically talk to anyone. But yet, this could be false. Afterwards I could theoretically talk and speak to anyone but it is up to the recipient to be able to listen. Which makes sense, I cannot really have a conversation with anyone if the person does not talk back. It would be as if I was talking to a wall and hoping it would speak back.
I think that many people struggle with listening. I often see this trait in younger people, often in my college. It would be hypocritical for me to say that I am a perfect listener, after all I am a young guy in college, but I do feel as if I do a lot better than most people.
I have found that most people in this world wish to be heard. I find it ironic that in an age where we could theoretically speak to anyone at any moment, people somehow manage to feel more disconnected now than before. In this situation however, I think the conversation managed to stay afloat due to the fact that I was mainly listening the whole time. Reality is that we are most likely to befriend others by being interested in them. You do not have to be interesting but simply interested. I think this concept pairs nicely with a quote by the Greek Philosopher, Epictetus.
We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.
-Epictetus
Interestingly, I believe that this interaction will affect the way in which I fare by train. Realistically, every person we encounter affects us in a minor way. Whether we notice or not. The same could be said about the lady, as for both of us, we will always think of each other whenever we look back to our first train ride.
If it wasn’t for the idea that I stopped and listened to her I would have never connected with her. I would have lost such a great opportunity to be able to connect with another human. Many are fearful of the connections we make with others. For certain situations, this can be a valid emotion. But for many, we are throwing away the opportunity of connection. We are all mosaic works of art created by experiences,connections and reactions. If we fail to listen to what the world has to say, why should the world listen to what we might say? Interactions like this could force us to change. But yet, that is part of life and improvement. The psyche needs new ideas the same way a vehicle needs new parts in order to run more effectively.
If there is anything to reflect from this piece of narrative it would be to be tentative to the connections and lasting impacts we leave on one and another. Like a train, life is always moving. The train may derail or be delayed but if we stop at the many stops of life and listen to the people, we can make lasting connections. Connections in that will shape who we are as a person, whether that change is miniscule or massive. At the very least, these connections could also test our character and help us reflect upon ourselves. However, this cannot be done fruitfully, if we do not learn to listen. The one who listens is as important as the one who speaks. If you want the world to stop and show you the person you wish to be, have the courage to ask the questions and listen. If you believe in what is just and fair, have the heart to listen, and when it is your turn you will be heard as well.
That lady was really friendly and well spoken. As I helped her stow her bags into her vehicle, I can’t help but to be grateful to have met her. I really hope that she is able to kick off her marriage soon!
An extremely quick photo of the train. It was taken with my camera.
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